Naked bicyclists on Spring Garden Road: My eyes, my eyes!

· Popular culture

I’m on Spring Garden right now and I just saw something horrific. There are a bunch of bicyclists who are riding around either naked or in shorts; in any case, none of them have that much on. But one guy was totally naked! He was overweight which was traumatic enough (I’m overweight too but I don’t go around riding a bike naked, whether I’m protesting something or not), but then I noticed that he was completely nude. I don’t think I can ever be happy again. Why couldn’t it have been the guy in front of him? And trust me, it looked worse the further I looked down. It’s like with me. The face is ok, but your eyes travel down, and your heart breaks. I think I’m going to start a protest against unattractive people riding around on their bikes naked.

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